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The heart-rending and inspiring novel from the critically acclaimed author of NOT IF I SEE YOU FIRST. How can you have a future if you can’t accept your past? Mel Hannigan doesn’t have it easy. Mourning the death of her firework of a brother, trying to fit back into a school she’s been conspicuously absent from and struggling to deal with the loss of three friendships that used to mean everything. Struggling to deal with a condition that not even her closest friends know about. So Mel tries to lock away her heart, to numb the highs and lows, to live quietly without hope – but also without pain. Until someone new shows her that it can be worth taking a risk, that opening up to life is what can make it glorious… And that maybe, Mel can discover a tragic kind of wonderful of her very own.